pray don’t worry “compartmentalize”

I pray so I don’t have to worry.

At 50 years old I learned in therapy the tools needed to cope. I essentially grew up. My family of origin was dysfunctional, so I was not aware of the pathology in my thinking that showed up in my behavior.

Therapy for me was examining behaviors that don’t serve me well, like catastrophizing. The understanding of why I do something helped me love myself unconditionally. I then had the confidence that I could reprogram and resetting my default to healthy thinking which fueled the change in how I respond to life’s challenges.
We say knowledge is power but it can only be powerful when we use what we have learned to change.
I had been known to freak out. To not be able to handle stress was my legacy. My family would deliberately keep things from me. They felt they had to protect me or I would collapse under the pressure.
After therapy I use the tool my therapist and I practiced, “compartmentalizing”.
It is inline with my now favorite motto or chant.

If you are going to pray, don’t worry and if you are going to worry don’t pray.

I had a situation come up yesterday that in the past would have sent me reeling straight into anger and then depression and the cycle would start. Depression, pain, and anger from feeling out control.

That is FEAR = False Evidence Appearing Real.

The truth is we have a choice to make moment to moment. We cant be happy and sad at the same exact moment. The brain does not work that way. And thank God because we would loose our choice or ability to be the miraculous human beings we are.

Our mindset is a choice. Our power lies in the fact we can create. We can think a thing, speak the thing and manifest a thing. It really is that simple.
I have changed. When things crop up and I don’t have the resources to solve the problem I am okay with allowing God to lead me to the solution.

Yesterday, I prayed and enjoyed the rest of my evening because there was nothing I could do about it at the time. I have learned to be present in the moment by compartmentalizing. I slept well last night. When I rose I went about my usual morning rituals. When I sat down and I allowed myself to think about it again, the problem was not as bad as I had initially thought.

No matter what I know I can trust God so I pray. Praying is giving it to God. But I don’t take it back by worrying about it. Breathing a sigh of relief, and smiling from the reassurance that it will all work out because I am in Gods will. Being happy moment to moment is the choice I make . Being present and Being grateful are the main keys to my happiness.

I am happy because I am grateful.

Catastrophizing

How to compartmentalize.

You can do it too.

I am officially a Walker. I am walking between 25 and 35 miles per week. After working with my Business Coach Marci Batiste I realized that I had no choice but to slow down the pace and make my health a priority. I am feeling better and bouncing back from flare ups much quicker. None of the changes made to improve my physical health would have been possible if it were not for the commitment I made to do the hard work of healing.
More than one therapist has told me that I am the exception. Most people in therapy don’t change because they are not willing to work.
I don’t believe I am that special. It comes down to your mindset. If you are determined to heal like I was, I PROMISE YOU that God, your Angels and the entire universe will rise up and support you.
I am not telling you what I read. I am telling you what I know from experience. Your will to heal puts everything in motion. If you take two steps God will support you to continue to take steps.
My mission is to inspire you to get some therapy. If I don’t do anything else in life I know beyond a shadow of doubt that God has used me to lead women to healing.
If I did it you can too.

Want Change? Change your mind.

I have been battling with changing two core beliefs this year. Therapy has helped me to examine my own behavior, think about where the root is and destroy it by changing the way I think.
One core belief was, {everybody was going to leave me). I expected it. So whenever I had feelings of being abandoned my brain could not tell that I was just having thoughts or remembering experiences.
Even though it was not really happening my brain told my body it was happening. I say this was a core belief because now that I have identified it, it no longer is a belief. It is a fear – (false evidence appearing real) to be dealt with accordingly.
Because of the knowledge I have gained in therapy about how I respond to triggers, I am able to identify and replace negative thoughts that once supported my core belief that everybody was going to leave.
I am sure I have sabotaged relationships in fear of the abandonment. It was kind of like I was protecting myself for what was to come.
Another core belief that I have had to acknowledge is I believed that people were out to get me. I have learned to trust the God in me. Moving slower will allows the process to happen. Now I understand and appreciate the value of waiting for direction.
While waiting, for the emotion to dissipate, I ask myself “What is the evidence of …..?”
Once the emotion is gone. I detach, pray and wait on God to give me the best solution. Sometimes nothing needs to be done. Other times I am led to a person, place or thing that holds THE ANSWER.But ALWAYS I get the LESSON. I am able to evolve to a new level.
There is no evidence that supports that belief that people always leave me and there is no evidence that people are out to get me.
I had some damage to my car and I assumed that it had been vandalized, but waiting allowed me to see that I was the one that had damaged my car. Once my mind was cleared of all those untrue thoughts I remembered exactly when and how it happened.
Three weeks is how long I waited for these profound epiphany’s. Being able to accomplish my goals is a direct result of working on my thinking which helps me to change my behavior. After doing the work in therapy the real Work begins. It does get better though, At first I hated examining everything I thought or did, but over time and with practice my snap back time (knowing that that was then and this is now)has decreased tremendously.
In full expectation I am looking forward to the day when I have successfully rewired my brain to not allow anything from my past to affect my now. Practice really does make perfect. It has already become second nature to identify and let go of the emotions of a trigger ASAP. I have truly been able to “Let Go, and Let God”
If you are going to worry, don’t pray, if you are going to pray, don’t worry.

mozayik “the souls’ poet”

praying (the writer’s need for solitude)

it’s a spiritual thing

I just need to clear my head

of the demons tormenting me

with sounds of past nightmares

and present day real or imagined harm

I am full

ready to pop

don’t want to drop

all my cares at every stop

need to breathe

to see me

I am blinded

by everyone else s importunities

craving aloneness

the only way I know to reach the part of me

that is free and filled with possibility

I just want to be unbound

in my mind is the only sanctuary to hide

until I can cope with difficulties outside of me

to have peace I have to touch the part of GOD that resides inside me

what I need can’t be found out there

I know it is hard to understand

the only way I know to get what I need

to deal with issues blinding me from what it is I am

silence is golden

solitude is good for the soul

it is a spiritual thing

don’t take it personally

it is all about me

needing

to let God lead me

by Mozayik “the souls’ poet”

Best Year Ever

Finally getting back on track. This year has already proven to be the best ever. It started with the amazing Manifest your Vision Event where I created a fantastic Vision Board. I promise you that many things have already come true. Not because the board is magical but because it is in a place in my home where I see it everyday and I am diligently working to make my vision happen.

Then I became laser focused on working with my Business Coach. I invested time, money and energy into learning and developing the tools needed to be a successful Business Owner. It is going to take a minute to incorporate all of the knowledge into practice It has already taken me and my business to the next level.

I realized through working with my Coach that I needed to slow down and focus on my health. I am diabetic and my numbers were out of control for various reasons, some not my fault.

Ultimately though it is my responsibility to improve the quality of my life. My number are good and I am exercising in the sun everyday. I have lost the extra 10 pounds and my energy levels are improving drastically.

Even though I did not sell a lot of #GirlGetYouSomeHelp t-shirts, the experience of getting ready to do business on Shopify and Printful will prove to be beneficial in making a profit in the near future. I was not fully ready to do business but at least I am set up and just need to add the final touches.

My visit home to St. Louis was truly life changing when I was able to read The Official Girl Get You Some Help poem among all of my favorite people in St. Louis. I was able to see where I have changed and also the opportunities for improvement within myself and my Business.

#GirlGetYouSomeHelp was taken to a new level. I learned so much and have more clarity on how to be better next time.

By the time my friend came to visit me in Phoenix for Pride, I did my best to muster up enthusiasm but I was spent.

Hanging out with friends at the Pride parade and Festival was one of the best times this year.

The very best and most precious times were meeting and spending time with my two new grandsons’. Going to the circus with two of my grandchildren, spending the night at my babygirl’s new home with her, her fiance and children was truly delightful. All of the family and friends I was blessed to share time with has been a blessing.

It is only April and I have no doubt that the rest of this year will stay on trend to be THE BEST YEAR EVER

We find each other, the ones that seek love. The price of love is truth.

The Souls' Poet

There are days when you come face to face with self. These are usually the hardest days of your life. In one moment, you will decide what the rest of your life will look like. There are only two choices. Choose the path of fear that tells you this is all you will ever be or have, so you might as well get what you can. You do not believe you deserve anything more and your life will stop. You will be living a lie. If your life is a lie then your life is a waste.

The great thing is the other choice is the path to self-love that leads to unconditional love for others because you have it for yourself. Unconditional does not mean you expect less of yourself. It really demands that you take responsibility for the choices you have made thus far. This will empower you to…

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